I am writing this post while in the midst of the said sleep regression. Sharing what I have been learning and trying out. Hoping to help out any of you other sleep-struggling moms out there! Just a few weeks ago (due I think to a combination of developmental milestones, a trip, and daylight savings) our perfect little sleeper … stopped being the perfect little sleeper.
What is a Sleep Regression?
Simply put, a sleep regression is a change in the typical sleep patterns. A change for the worst that is. Regressing in progress made toward independent and restful sleep. They happen to all of us. Little ones are prone to sleep regression for a whole multitude of reasons. When it happens though, all of us parents are asking the same thing. What do I do?!
What Causes Sleep Regression?
Basically a lot of things.
- Most experts say that any time your little one is achieving developmental milestones (walking, talking, sitting up etc…) they may experience a sleep regression.
- Changes in routine can do it too.
- A trip, or a visit from family.
- Teething is another common culprit.
- Or illness of any kind for that matter.
- Developing separation anxiety can be another one.
- Pick anything else that upsets the stability of the toddler’s life andyou have another probable cause.
What Do I Do?
First of all. This wont last forever. If you didn’t have to sleep train your baby already, now you can learn some of the techniques I recommend. If you have already worked hard with little sleeper to get a good pattern down, you are just going to follow those same steps to re-instate normalcy again.
- Evaluate where you are at:
- Not going to sleep well
- Waking during the night
- Waking too early in the morning
- Start there.
- Basically for any of the above issues, follow the steps in my Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night post
- Establish some stability for the kid again. If they are losing it when you leave the room, sit nearby and reassure them. Slowly build their confidence as you move further away until you can leave them alone in the room to fall asleep.
- Try really really hard not to pick them up and rock them to sleep. This also establishes a pattern… and it isn’t independent sleep…
- Watch the clock. I remind myself of this often. When my little one is crying, 3 minutes feels like years. Watch the clock to ground yourself in reality and give them 5-10 minutes to self soothe if they will.
- Build skills slowly
- Once you know where to start, don’t get stuck in one step. Slowly move toward independence again. Keep building on whatever stage you are at. Move closer to the door, rock for less time etc…
- Be patient
- Time goes by slow when you (or your baby) are not sleeping enough. Be patient. It WILL get better.
- Try to eliminate things that may be contributing
- screen time right before bed
- bedtime disruptions (or frequent late bedtime)
- Late dinner
- Rushed bedtime routines
- etc….
Kids thrive on patterns. Little creatures of habit. If you can get them into a pattern that facilitates good night time sleep, it will help everyone in the family. I work hard to try to keep bedtime around the same time every night. For us that is between 6:45 and 7:15. Daylight savings has been a real doozy for that, but we kept it at the same time and are just working back into the pattern. Slowly adjustments are happening. Waking times are going back to normal, and I have hope that soon the bedtime routine of a little wave and “goodnight” before walking out of the room will be back!
Can I Prevent Sleep Regressions?
Nope… not really. You can avoid some of the common causes. But choosing not to go on vacation for 3 years… well lets just say that wont solve your child’s sleep problems and if you ask me… isn’t worth the trade off even if it did. We love to travel. We just accept that with a young kid its going to be rough sleep for a couple days and things will settle down soon. Like I said before, most sleep regressions are caused by other major developments… so really they are a good thing in that sense. Sleep starts to fall apart? Something else amazing is about to happen! Wouldn’t want to prevent that would we?
